The Real Issues

The Poor Man gets to the bottom of things:

In this election, the voters will be faced with two main questions:

1) Is George W. Bush the greatest man alive today, or the greatest man who ever lived?

2) How totally fucking gay is that John Kerry who wants us to get killed by terrorists?

This whole AWOL thing is just a transparent ploy by liberals to distract the public from these weighty matters. Please, please don't let them win.

[UPDATE: Question for gay readers - do you spend as much time thinking about gay sex as Bush-worshipping Republicans do? If so, where do you find the time?]

Re: his question to readers: "What you think of when you think of homosexuality is, of course, buggery."---John Derbyshire (National Review's in-house bigot)